what to do , what to do...?
ok , my grandad is in his 80's , and his doctor has been telling him for the past two years to go to a rest-home , we moved to indonesia last week , and we havent found an apartment yet , we are still looking , and were no where near settled down. my grandfather has been telling me that he wants to come here for a holiday , but whenever my father is talking to him , he doesnt mention it .. he told me on the phone today that he plans on visiting us next month and asking our adress , but we dont even have one yet.. i am worried that once he gets here , he will be very ill from the long flight from autralia to indonesia .. he said he is feeling like a lonely old man , but that is really all his fault .. he didnt look after his wife , she left him , he didnt look after his money , he now has none ...because he likes to impress people and used to take young ladys out for dinner and taking them on holidays & paying for everything and then go on about how 'it turned heads ' and all those ladys would keep ringing him , he had a good business , was earning a reasonable amount of money ..but now its all gone .. all his workers are retiring and there are people calling up asking with jobs , but he says he cant , because he only has a few workers left as they are all retiring and hes too old to train more people bcoz he is very old now.. and he has no more money.. no women call him any more , now that he has no more money.. he gets very grumpy and shouts alot at people on the phone , he talks like he is a rich man , and that has led his friends to not talk to him anymore.. he doesnt have anything left in australia ..not even a house .. but he receives money from the government (pention) and the government will subsidise his daily medication because he has had about 6 heart attacks and a lot of minor strokes .. the government will pay for him to go to a rest home in australia .. i am worried that once he gets here .. he will be very sick .. and my father has just moved here and has lots of pressure on his job , he is working 7 days a week at the moment until everthing is running smoothly which could be a few months away. we are just about to enrol in school , so we are really not settled yet..and hearing my grandfather say he is coming here .. is worrying me , because i think it will stress my dad .. i have mentioned a little bit about this to my dad and he just said he doesnt want his dad to come here and pulled more cigarettes out .... it is very hard because no insurance company will insure him .. we have made many inquiries ..and where we are is just a very hard place for him .. so i dont know how my dad will juggle all this .. since we are new to this country .. another thing that worries me .. is him not wanting to leave .. i think that he will buy a one way ticket and want to stay with us permantly .. we could not handle this , since he is supposed to be in a rest home .. and we will not be living in a house made for old people...we will be in a apartment maybe 30 stories high..and it is not close to a hospital due to all the traffic.. he has other children in aus , but he never even visits them ! he had one son , who he never visited since he was 5 ! and he still hasnt visited his sons widow ..or his grandchildren from them , or his great granddaughter .. he has another son who lives just two hours away and he never visits them.. i dont know why he wants to visit us and be a burden ? we are such a long way away .. and when we lived in the pacific , myself and my mom used to fly to australia every 3 months to visit him , because he would say he was lonely .. he is also an actor .. it was his proffesion for many year.. he did many pantomines and was offered jobs over seas as an actor.. so i cant really tell if he is emotional or just pretending , he trys to make us feel sorry for him , and hang his botttom lip.. but hes really old to travel now..he might end up very sick.. he needs to lie down atleast once every hour and hes been like that for years .. he also goes on about his friends living in retirement villages and cost three hundred and fifty thousand $ ... but all those friends had houses that they sold to move there.. he doesnt i think he feels we should pay for him to live in a fancy retirement village or he will come live here with us .. we have been internationally transferred 4 times this year and what if we have to do it again ? we even struglle to pay our international schooling ,so hes just going to another expense.. i dont know why he is trying to burden us ..where he is now is the best place for him becaus of the financial aid ..and the medical resources..maybe if we were in a country tht had good resources for oldies .. and had our own house ..we could make him a grandpa wing and he could live next door to us ,and eat with us . but not here ..were just not in tht position .. im sorry for the longness , and i know this sounds mean , but i just dont understand and dont kn
Family - 1 Answers
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Sounds like gramps is telling YOU on the fone about the visit, and not dad, because he already KNOWS dad will have NONE of it! Gramps is thereby playing on YOUR sympathies as his means to come and live with you! Since he does NOT mention the visit to dad, he probably does not really plan to attempt such a journey...so whatever you do, DON'T give him any address details, or gramps will interpret the info you give as an open invitation to come to Indonesia!
