Should i continue the family business, or pursue my dream & potential?
Some of you here who've followed many of my questions in Fluther would perhaps already know that my passion has always been music. There's not a single day (even probably hour) that goes by without my head constantly think (& imagining) new musical ideas. And not only that, but also some professional music industry people, locally & overseas, as well as people here who've seen & heard my music all already told me that i have this 'unusual rare' talent in music, being that i can compose, songwrite, and arrange many types of music, including symphony, jazz, and even some 'out-of-this-world' kind of music. Now some short story of mine: ever since I've graduated from U.S in 2003 (in a wrong major that I have almost zero interest, just because I was still too naive back then & just follow what my dad & uncle told me. My major was in Business Finance & Management), I've come back to my home country (Indonesia), and straight away worked in the family-business for about 7 years now. During those times, in the free time I managed to pursue my passion in music by forming band, but unfortunately, it kept failing several times (now that I've learned a lot, I do think that it's mostly because I still very lacking experience back then & just simply didn't know what to do, not to mention the members were all not too good in their skill playings etc). The problem is this: my 'free-spirited', musical, creative & people-oriented personality is soo dominating, that as time passed by, I unfortuately grew more dislike toward my family-business, and last year I even went to a psychiatrist alone,...still without solving anything. There were also some *heavy* regrets,..that I've "wasted" so much time by not being firm & bold telling my parents (especially my dad) that I wanted to try out new things 1st, all before I've decided to sit & run/manage the family-business! I've always thought of going to China to study mandarin, I've even thought of following few of my friends' stories/path to go to Japan, or U.K, to try to make a "break through" or career in music. However, I didn't do ALL of them, simply because I'm a coward who's very *scared* to be bold & taking risks, & confronting my parents about what I really want to do/try in life. Because I thought I don't want to hurt their feelings by being 'selfish', 'naive kid' etc. It's only very recently (after all these 7 years), that my parents seem to start paying attention to my ever-burning music passion, yet I can sense that my dad only wants me to work in the "BIG business" aspect of the music 'industry', such as to be the big music labels like SONY. I always thought that that's just so unrealistic, that he (my dad) only want to see the 'big success' side without wanting to see the small little steps that have to be taken to achieve that! And besides, my talent & passion is in the *MUSIC* aspect, not the *business* aspect. A lot of people have told me I make very good, touching, & unique music. I also seem to be very good in teaching & being patient working with people,..but all my dad wants is for me to be the 180-degrees opposite of me: to become a succesful businessman, with a BIG money. I can somewhat understand when he said that "everything in this life needs money! from cars, house, etc" (we're a medium-well type of family in terms of wealth). So I am very torn now. What should I really be doing? Should I pursue my music dreams, or should I continue putting my 'mask' & continue running the family business (in which *everybody* already know I have zero passion in it, and hence, is being "lazy" and doing all things "half-efforts") ? I have a strong, solid vision to write, and collaborate with musicians overseas (I write english lyrics), and try post 'em in Myspace, Youtube, iTunes etc, in hoping there'll be music producers overseas who's interested in me & my music. While if I were to stay in this family-business for another 2, 3, or i-don't-know-how-many-years, EVERYBODY including my dad already know that I "don't go *anywhere* or not progressing at all!" But the only thing that I'm still very confused is: who'll continue the family-business then? I have two little brothers, but they're also interested in other things than running the family-business. While my uncle & cousin in the business actually have talked/suggested for my father to sell his share of the business, so he can get the money, to perhaps finance other businesses, or even to help me in pursuing my music dreams. What should I do? I am almost 28 yrs old now, and I really hate the fact that I can get really depressed these days, confused, and not making any progress in music, because of all these overwhelming thoughts! I hate to always burdening my parents in financial needs, yet on another side, I can't hide that I am also scared/unsure of my future in music, ie: "can I make it?...no matter how much I BELIEVE in my talent & music vision,..what if *ALL things* are against me?? and
Family - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Wow, it sounds like you have alot of talent. But I also know how hard it is to leave a business, especially a family one. But if music is what you feel you should do, no matter how hard it is you should pursue it. Life is short... doing what gets the most money is not always best, because in the end, what does money matter? I think you should pursue music.
2 :
pursue your dream
3 :
Write songs for now and get them published. Then if you are good enough, make the family business a side line and devote all of your time in the music business. Take some music classes on-line to learn the basics and proceed from there. All it takes is one song to catch on and then you will make enough money to form a band of your own. Good luck.
4 :
Your father is right in saying that everything costs money. You need a steady income, but you also need to use your talents. You don't want to live a life full of regret, always wondering if you could have been a successful musician. The fact that you would be doing what you love will give you an edge when you have to compete. It will make it possible for you to create beautiful music that many people will love, which is something you have already done. Is there a way to involve your music abilities in the family business? If not, you might want to start making contacts in the music industry and ask for advice on what to do next. Find out what is in demand. Who knows, maybe you will be the next John Williams. Take some action today.
5 :
It is not a easy question to be answered. It is all about your life. A simple success formula in life is : "Do what you Love". if you love music then you can do it. believe in yourself. never lose your control. In money aspect, yes we can not live without money but Money is not everything in life. if you think you can do then money will come behind you. Do not run behind the money. Run behind your dream that you can achieve success in your life. thanks
